


doctor of law's emoji prescriptions

by BookWorm77071



Category: A Court of Thorns and Roses Series - Sarah J. Maas
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, I don't buy the whole 'I never got around to learning how to read', I put so much into each character's texting style, Including Feyre's dyslexia, Oh yeah I made Feyre dyslexic, Told via texts, she is dyslexic sjm! let her be!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-04
Updated: 2019-08-04
Packaged: 2020-07-31 06:55:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20110981
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BookWorm77071/pseuds/BookWorm77071
Summary: Modern AH AU. Feyre introduces her sisters to her boyfriend and his family. Told via texts and group chats.





	doctor of law's emoji prescriptions

**Author's Note:**

> So, this is my first ACoTaR fic. I've been working on this for a while (in my head, mostly) and finally got around to finishing it. Enjoy!

_ Feyre Archeron _ to  _ The She Musketeers _ : So you’re both coming to dinner this Saturday night?

_ Elain Archeron: _ Yes! Can’t wait!

_ Nesta Archeron: _ Yes

_ Feyre:  _ Great So I’ll send you the address but you still have to call me when you get there because getting into Rhys’ apartment is kind of a hassle

_ Elain: _ What should we wear?

_ Feyre:  _ Oh I know it sounds fancy but we’re totally casual

_ Nesta:  _ Elain, when did you choose this God-awful group name?

_ Elain: _ ?? what’s wrong with it?

_ Feyre: _ I like the new group name

_ Nesta: _ Did you even read The Three Musketeers?

_ Elain: _ I saw the mickey mouse one

Feyre: I saw the barbie one

_ Nesta: _ Why does it have to say she instead of three?

_ Nesta: _ There was a Barbie one?

_ Elain: _ so that we know we’re girls

_ Feyre:  _ Yeah barbie and the three musketeers

_ Elain:  _ or any she/her individuals

_ Nesta: _ If Barbie doesn’t need to specify she then why do you?

_ Elain _ changed the group name to  _ Three/3/III/...-- _

_ Feyre:  _ Since when do you know morse?

_ Nesta:  _ Elain, for God’s sake

_ Nesta Archeron _ to  _ Little Feyre: _ So is Barbie a part of the three? Because it’s not exactly clear from the title.

* * *

_ Rhysand Setareh  _ to  _ Cass and the Machine:  _ which one of you stole my good jacket?

_ Cassian Razmande _ : u have no good jackets

_ Azriel Sayeh _ : Cassian did.

_ Cassian _ : all ur jackets are lame

_ Cassian _ : wow, traitor much??

_ Azriel _ : I think he left it at Mor’s.

_ Rhys _ : cool, thanks

_ Rhys _ : thanks @Az I mean

_ Rhys _ : if it wasn’t clear I was not thanking you for stealing my best jacket

_ Cassian _ : so i think this is a betrayal on two accounts, one thinking i would steal a lame jacket and two ratting me out

_ Rhys _ : why’d you even take it? you only ever wear your leather one anyway

_ Cassian _ : i d i d n o t t a k e y o u r s t u p i d j a c k e t

_ Azriel: _ He had a date with a woman named Charlotte Reddon. She’s a senior actuary for Helion at Day’s Savings.

_ Rhys _ : wow, really?

_ Cassian _ : honestly the idea that i would ever date anyone who works in insurance counts as betrayal number 3

_ Cassian _ : no!!!

_ Cassian Razmande  _ to  _ Razzmatazz _ : how did you find out??? she literally just made senior actuary this week??

_ Azriel _ to  _ Cass and the Machine _ : [Screenshot image]

_ Cassian _ : WOW

_ Rhys _ : well congrats to Charlotte!!!!!

_ Cassian _ changed the group name to  _ Cass and Rhys and Traitor Joes _

_ Azriel _ changed the group name to  _ Cass and Rhys and Traitor Joe _

_ Azriel _ : It’s only Joe’s if you mean to assign ownership to the establishment.

_ Cassian _ has removed  _ Azriel  _ from the group chat.

_ Rhys _ : so, how did it go??

_ Cassian _ : Not Well Thanks For Asking

_ Rhys _ : ah, well. you just need to get out more.

_ Cassian _ : i go out all the time?

_ Rhys _ : i mean like... go out and talk to someone who is not me or az or mor or amren or Feyre

_ Cassian _ : whyd you only capitalize her name?

_ Rhys _ : she deserves it :)

_ Cassian _ has removed  _ Rhys  _ from the group chat.

* * *

_ Feyre Archeron _ to  _ Rhys <3 _ : Seating arrangements are too much comma right question mark

_ Feyre _ : Not like that exclamation point

_ Feyre _ : Oh my God I hate this text to talk 

_ Feyre _ : I give up!!!!

_ Rhysand Setareh  _ to  _ Darling Feyre My Love and Life<3<3<3 _ : bit early for a break down, i think.

_ Feyre _ : It’s never too early for a break down

_ Feyre _ : Seating arrangements question mark

_ Feyre: _ I mean seating arrangements punctuation question mark

_ Feyre _ : J E S U S

_ Rhys _ : don’t hurt yourself

_ Feyre _ : Too late already walked into a pole

_ Rhys _ : what??? are you okay???

_ Feyre _ : Fine just tell me what you think about seating arrangements

_ Rhys _ : unnecessary

_ Rhys _ : we’ll just tell everyone where to sit ahead of time and your sisters won’t have to decide where to sit

_ Feyre _ : But I don’t know where they should sit!

_ Feyre _ : Oh that’s how you do it!

_ Feyre _ : Reece I got it to work!

_ Feyre _ : Oh it’s got your name wrong

_ Rhys _ : i really think you’re overreacting

_ Feyre _ : Can I like register your name?

_ Rhys _ : i’ll do it when you get home

_ Rhys _ : also don’t worry about it. you’re sitting next to me and your sisters will be across from us and the other will fill in the spots

_ Rhys _ : oh we should keep cass and amren away from elain

_ Feyre _ : Yeah, but we need to keep Cassian away from Nesta, too.

_ Rhys _ : i think nesta can handle herself

_ Feyre _ : Cassian can’t.

* * *

_ Nesta Archeron _ to  _ Little Feyre _ : Okay we’re outside

_ Feyre Archeron _ to  _ Nesta, PhD _ : Okay, the doorlady’s name is Nuala, tell her you’re coming to see us

_ Nesta _ : There’s no one here named Nuala?

_ Feyre _ : Maybe her twin Cerridwen?

_ Nesta _ : You have twin doorladies?

_ Feyre _ : It’s really not as weird as you think it is

* * *

_ Morrigan Liolle  _ to  _ Fey _ : Survived the night?

_ Feyre Archeron _ to  _ Mor _ : no

_ Feyre _ : Nesta’s never speaking to me again, I think.

_ Mor _ : She’ll come around. How’s Elain?

_ Feyre: _ Pretending like nothing happened which is good I guess?

_ Mor _ : How is that good?

_ Feyre _ : Well, she and I are still on for Saturday night.

Mor: Huh. Well, that is good.

_ Morrigan Lilolle  _ to  _ Idiot _ : You owe Nesta Archeron a new shirt

_ Mor: _ And skirt

_ Mor: _ And shoes

_ Cassian Razmand _ e to  _ Mor:  _ i’ll thank you not to tell me how to dress nesta, thanks very much

_ Mor _ : You didn’t say anything in that vein to her, did you??????

_ Mor _ : Cassian answer me

_ Mor _ : Cassian

_ Mor _ : C a s s i a n

_ Mor _ : I guess I never did sit you down and teach you how to talk to women.

_ Morrigan Liolle _ to  _ Rhys _ : We may be in need of some damage control.

_ Rhysand Setareh  _ to Mor: but Feyre and elain are still on for saturday?

_ Rhys _ : and i don’t think she’s mad at Feyre?

_ Rhys _ : oh

_ Rhysand Setareh  _ to  _ Cass:  _ What Did You Do Now.

_ Cassian Razmande _ to  _ Rhys’s Pieces _ : nothing????

_ Rhys: _ to NESTA

_ Cassian _ : oh

_ Cassian _ : what do you care?

_ Rhys _ : if you have fucked this up for Feyre even more is2g

_ Cassian: _ i haven’t!!!!!!!!!

_ Azriel Sayeh _ to  _ Cassian _ : Did you try and come on to Nesta after ruining dinner last night?

_ Cassian Razmande _ to  _ Mor _ : what are you OBSESSED with getting me in trouble??????????????

_ Amren  _ to  _ No Drunk Strip Karaoke Allowed At The Penthouse _ : @Cassian Razmande, why don’t you clear up exactly what you said to Nesta Archeron?

_ Feyre Archeron _ : Yes I’d be thrilled to hear 

_ Rhysand Setareh _ : i think we all would be

_ Cassian Razmande: _ jesus

_ Cassian _ : well since her clothes got all messed up at dinner

_ Cassian _ : as i was gallantly walking her out

_ Morrigan Liolle _ : you messed up all her clothes at dinner

_ Azriel Sayeh _ : You locked her out.

_ Cassian _ : i offered to buy her some new clothes and wash the ones she had on

Azriel: Jesus, Cassian.

_ Mor: _ g o d feyre i’m sorry

_ Cassian _ : what is so bad about that??????

_ Amren _ : Cassian. Do you think we’re all convinced you offered to reimburse Nesta for her troubles and drop off her outfit at the dry cleaner’s?

_ Feyre _ : she said it was the worst way she’s ever been asked out on a date

_ Cassian Razmande _ to  _ Feyr Bear _ : she said it was a date?

_ Cassian _ : because she sorta said yes.

* * *

_ Cassian Razmande _ to  _ Nesta;)PhD;) _ : so i hear you’re spreading rumors about us? ;)

_ Nesta Archeron _ to  _ Cassian Feyre’s New Idiot Friend _ : Who is this?

_ Cassian _ : aww don’t be like that;)

_ Cassian _ : come on nes;)

_ Nesta _ : Don’t call me Nes, you ass.

_ Cassian _ : so you do have my number;)

_ Nesta _ : What the hell is up with all the winking emoticons?

_ Cassian: _ i heard you got a little worked up after yesterday

_ Nesta _ : Oh, you mean when you poured dinner all over me?

_ Nesta _ : Or before that, when you insulted my career?

_ Nesta _ : Or after that, when you locked me outside?

_ Cassian _ : no after that

_ Cassian _ : when we made plans for our date

_ Nesta Archeron _ to  _ Little Feyre _ : I don’t know where you find your strays, Feyre, but you keep them out of my life.

[One call from Feyre Archeron to Nesta, PhD]

[One call from Feyre Archeron to Rhys<3]

[One call from Rhysand Setareh to Cass]

_ Cassian Razmande _ to  _ Nesta;)PhD;):  _ so i’ve just been informed that you did not actually agree to come along with me on a clothes-shopping date.

_ Nesta Archeron _ to  _ Cassian Feyre’s New Idiot Friend:  _ Oh do you think?

Cassian: in my defense your sarcasm is too subtle

Nesta: Sarcasm is only worth it if it’s subtle

Cassian: we can debate the merits of too-subtle and overtness over breakfast after tonight

Cassian: DON’T call feyre to tell on me to rhys again that was a joke

Cassian: but dinner?

_ Nesta Archeron _ to  _ Ellie _ : I don’t like Feyre’s new friends. Do you?

_ Elain Archeron _ to  _ Nesta My Big Sister<3 _ : i think i liked them

_ Nesta _ : You think you liked them? What does that mean?

_ Elain _ : well i got the feeling they were performing

_ Nesta _ : Oh, you think that was them trying more than usual?

_ Elain _ : come on it wasn’t so bad

_ Nesta _ : You left dry

_ Elain _ : did cassian ask you out for real?

_ Elain Archeron  _ to  _ Feyre My Little Sister<3: _ :)

_ Feyre Archeron _ to  _ Ellie<3 _ : ....yes???

_ Elain _ : nesta’s got a crush:)

_ Feyre _ : Oh?

_ Elain _ : she can’t stop thinking about him:)

_ Feyre _ : In fairness that could be her spitting rage

_ Elain _ : no one in this family understands love.

_ Cassian Razmande _ to  _ Feyr Bear _ : look, am i taking your sister on a date or not?

_ Feyre Archeron _ to  _ Cass _ : ???????? Idk?????????

_ Feyre _ : Are you????????

_ Cassian _ : like. i don’t know. that’s why i’m asking you

_ Cassian _ : i have asked repeatedly and i believe she has said yes but someone is planting seeds of doubt in my mind

_ Feyre _ : Is someone Nesta or Rhys?

_ Feyre _ : Because if it’s Nesta I think it’s safe to say you’re not actually going out

_ Amren  _ to  _ Nesta Archeron _ : Just put the boy out of his misery.

_ Nesta Archeron _ : Sorry, who is this?

_ Amren _ : Amren. We met at dinner the other night.

_ Nesta _ : Oh, Feyre’s friend.

_ Amren _ : From dinner. Anyway, he’s an idiot, sure, but torturing lesser beings is still generally frowned upon.

_ Nesta _ : How am I torturing him, exactly?

_ Amren _ : Just let him know if you’re going out or not.

_ Nesta Archeron _ to  _ Little Feyre _ : [Message deleted]

_ Nesta Archeron _ to  _ Ellie _ : [Message deleted]

_ Nesta Archeron _ to  _ Amren _ : What do you think I should do?

_ Amren _ to Nesta  _ Archeron _ : Regarding?

_ Nesta _ : You know

_ Nesta _ : Him

_ Nesta _ : Cassian

_ Amren _ : Trust your instincts, girl.

_ Nesta Archeron _ to  _ Cassian Feyre’s New Idiot Friend: _ It really was the worst date-proposal I’ve ever received 

_ Cassian Razmande _ to  _ Nesta;)PhD;):  _ was it really???

_ Cassian _ : at least i offered to pay

_ Nesta: _ It is 100% the initiating party’s responsibility to pay for the date

_ Cassian _ : is that your professional legal opinion?

_ Nesta _ : It is

_ Nesta _ : So hypothetically, Tuesday lunch would be on me

_ Nesta _ : If you were free

_ Nesta _ : And I were asking you out

_ Cassian _ : hypothetically i would be free for that

_ Cassian _ : well, dr. archeron?

_ Cassian: _ are you asking me out?

_ Nesta _ : Yes.

_ Cassian _ : then i’ll see you tuesday

_ Cassian: _ ;)

_ Cassian _ : see? the winking emoticons are necessary. look how un-into our date i look without it

_ Cassian _ : v v much into our date btw

_ Nesta _ : Quit while you’re ahead

_ Cassian _ : if those are the doctor’s orders:)

_ Cassian _ : what’s your stance on regular smilies?

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it! If you did, please let me know in a comment:) if you'd like to talk to me about my wife Nesta Archeron, you can find me on Tumblr @ladynestaarcheron.


End file.
